A story from NPR discusses a couple of mixed-faith, he an atheist, she a believer (lutheran).
Our readers will recognize that your blogger is in the same situation: I'm a non-believer, my wife an Episcopalian. We've talked about that a lot. I'm an ex Catholic who happily is part of an Episcopal Community.
On the comments to the NPR story, many people said that this mixed-identity would be a "deal-breaker" for a relationship for them.
I don't get that. But then, I've matured from my anti-religious phase to my post-religious phase. I've come to recognize myself as a cultural Christian who goes to Mass or even better, evensong to enjoy the aesthetics of cultural faith. Regardless of the God-thing, I get the community, and share the values.
I think that BP and I, as a couple, are much more fulfilled now that we have found a place that welcomes us both where we are. And they do welcome us, and cheerfully include both of us in their life. I suspect that some conservatives would be uncomfortable with that. On the other hand, when BP was Roman Catholic, I was completely excluded because I could not find a modus vivendi with those people, and I was obviously not welcome At All.
Further, the essence of making a relationship work is mutual respect. If I did not respect that my wife has an experience (faith) that i do not, or if she (or her church) tried to convert me, OR ELSE, this would be a problem. But it isn't a problem...because we have mutual respect, and because the Episcopal Church finds a place for our complexity. They want not just BP, but me. Pretty amazing feeling.
Thank you for that.
Indeed, I think it would be far more problematic if one of us were a tea-party Republican while the other a liberal Democrat. Now THAT wouldn't work at all. ;-)