Monday, May 25, 2009

Will I still be married tomorrow?

In today's NY Times:
In addition to answering [the legality of Prop8], however, the seven-member court is expected to address the legal status of some 18,000 same-sex couples who were married in California between June — when the legalization took effect — and Election Day in November.

The state’s top law enforcement official, Attorney General Jerry Brown, said last year that he believed those same-sex marriages would be legal regardless of Proposition 8. But opponents of same-sex marriage argue that it is illogical to continue to recognize marriages that can no longer be legally performed here.

Andrew P. Pugno, the general counsel for ProtectMarriage.com, the leading group behind Proposition 8, said that it was meant to be “a blanket unqualified statement that applies to all marriages."
Please go here for my reflections on what my marriage means to me.

And please, wherever you are, join the Day of Decision rallies throughout CA and across the country.


21 comments:

Priscilla said...

IT, it may be of little comfort but I believe, as I was taught in the RC church many years ago, that a marriage is performed by the 2 people who are entering a covenant of love together and what God has joined, no human can put asunder.

That doesn't even touch the tip of the inequality and discrimination you suffer, I know, but I am praying for you, your wife, and all who are fortunate enough to have loving partners in their lives.

As a single, aging person I have sometimes ignored the great marriage debate because I have no one (and no prospects for a few years now) to marry. But your postings have helped me realize that I have been selfish and I will be there tomorrow and always to stand beside you and fight, if necessary, to cry tears of joy or bitterness, and to fight for equality for all of us.

Stay strong!

FranIAm said...

IT - I am sending my every good thought wish and prayer. I am also posting something that links to this and is a reminder to us all (courtesy of Doxy) that marriage is not currently equal.

James said...

Regardless of what the decision is tomorrow, you and BP will still be married for time and eternity. The state cannot dissolve your marriage - it can only dissolve the privileges that come with state recognized contracts.

All blessings to you and BP, my friends.

Leonardo Ricardo said...

¨As a single, aging person I have sometimes ignored the great marriage debate because I have no one (and no prospects for a few years now) to marry.¨ Priscilla

Thanks for that honesty, Priscilla. Yes, me too...it didn´t or wouldn´t apply to me anyway.

That is until I met someone that I might wish to marry (but then again my Uncle Al had his second marriage, with his second woman, when he was 90...and they were adorable and so loving for their remaining years)...anyway, I once felt completely ¨hopeless¨ in terms of accepting myself...I believed the righteous/selective smears and lies that I heard spread around me about me and people like me, what difference did it make...I didn´t count? I was a lost Soul a participating, tax paying outcast? Why didn´t they like me?

I listened and listened until I was ready to kill myself with agreement. Afterall, I must be the horrid/slimy creature that many made people like me out to be...I mean *they* must be right, there were so many of them, so why should I care about me, self-loathing made much better sense? That is, until I discovered that God wanted me to have the courage ¨to be¨ the person God made me to be and also no longer go along with the slandering side show, to learn how to say no and to learn how to say NO, NO and I mean NO...I went from hopelessly distraught to hopefilled in a single night.

Now, let´s see what happens tomorrow because YES or NO YES (as Juan Carlos would say when he questions me in Spanish) isn´t the end of me saying NO. NO to NO more discrimination, persecution, injustice and especially, NO, to bigots, at Church and beyond Church, pretending they aren´t indulging in bigotry when they treat me and people like me unjustly.

We´re not going anywhere. Yes or No Yes.

Ann said...

Hope to be rejoicing - in any case - it will be back to work as la luta continua in many places.

Марко Фризия said...

I offer you all my prayers and solidarity as we await the decision of the court.

Paul said...

IT, you and BP and all other married couples and couples wanting to be married are in my prayers tonight.

As noted above, you may lose privileges but you won't lose your relationship.

Justice now!

Jane R said...

Dear IT,
Just a quick note to send solidarity and to assure you and BP that I will continue to stand with you as an ally and that I honor your love for each other. I await tomorrow's news with trepidation. And I am certain, as others have said above, that your love has Godde's blessing and is indeed sacramental. May it continue to be a witness to others and to nourish each of you.

IT said...

Thank you, all! The decision will post at 10am PDT. It's the only thing on the news. It's agony. I'll let you know...

Göran Koch-Swahne said...

Yes you are! in the eyes of God and us all.

Perhaps not in the eyes of the law though... but that seems a bit complicated after last years ruling ;=)

Be in good cheer bopth of you. Remember we are many who love you.

Erp said...

My thoughts are with you and BP and the many others in the same situation.

Ann said...

What I wrote on my Daily Office site today:

But whenever you enter a town and they do not welcome you, go out into its streets and say, 'Even the dust of your town that clings to our feet, we wipe off in protest against you. Yet know this: the kingdom of God has come near.' Luke 10:10-11


Kindom
is here
even when
the welcome
is weak.

Göran Koch-Swahne said...

Dean Eva Brunne, formerly Vicar of Fleminsberg elected and confirmed as new Bishop of Stockholm today.

413 votes against 365 for her competitor, another well known Stockholm Vicar (of Sophia Parish were the Rainbow-masses are held every month).

There is however some sort of appeal hovering, maybe because Ms Brunne is an out Lesbian...

PseudoPiskie said...

Waiting and holding hands virtually.

Göran Koch-Swahne said...

Since Dean Tuulikki Koivonen Bylund is the new Bishop of Härnösand this means there will be 3 out of 13 Lady Bishops, from now on.

James said...

Ann - I didn't know you had a DO blog. what's the URL? I'll link to it.

Ann said...

James - it is a listserve
dailyoffice@yahoogroups.com

to receive them most days send a note to

dailyoffice-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

It also goes out on the lamentable ecunet Daily Office Scripture Study

Wormwood's Doxy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Leonardo Ricardo said...

Well, IT, you´re safe. Good for you! Horray that you and your BP are on the liferaft. As for the 1-2loaf nonsense it depends which part of the injustice you are continuing to be served how palitable or plain poison it is...hardly a time for celebration for a whole people, a whole segment of the population who have once more been discriminated against...forced tokenism is hardly a joyous thing...however, perhaps these legal ¨standing¨ marriages will bring cause for a lawsuit from the equal, but not equal, havenots.

Wormwood's Doxy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
IT said...

People keep congratulating me but I feel terrible. It isn't about us. We'll be marching tonight. Hope you all will too.